DECEMBER 19, 2025
Neither of my parents had corporate jobs. I didn’t absorb the unwritten rules of the workplace at family dinners. But I did have a relentless curiosity about how influence actually works.
That led me to become a licensed therapist and executive coach, research human behavior, and write my book, “Managing Up: How to Get What You Need From the People in Charge.”
What I’ve discovered from coaching thousands of top performers is that you can be 10, 15 or even 20 years into your career and still feel like you’re missing the handbook on how to be taken seriously.
If you want to be seen as operating at the next level, even before you have the title, here are the six things you need to do that 99% of people miss.
These principles of influence apply whether you’re navigating the office, family dynamics, or personal relationships. The ability to package your ideas and communicate decisively changes how people perceive and respond to you in every setting.
1. Don’t just present your ideas, package them
You might have the best insights. But if you don’t frame them in terms decision-makers care about most, your message will fall flat.
Stop communicating about the tasks you’ve accomplished and instead focus on outcomes. For instance, “We analyzed the data and updated the slides,” can become, “The numbers show that if we go with option B, we’ll see a 15% return on investment.”
2. Say less to sound smarter
When you over-explain, you think you’re being thorough, but to everyone else, it sounds like rambling. More information doesn’t always add value.
Being concise shows command of the topic. If you can’t boil a topic down to its essence, then you don’t understand it well enough.
Saying, “We have three key areas to cover: customer engagement, product positioning, and go-to-market strategy,” and encapsulating each in a few crisp sentences sounds more credible than a 15-minute explanation that buries your point.
3. Build consensus before the meeting
The time to get buy-in is in the days leading up to an important conversation, not during it.
Savvy professionals preview their ideas one-on-one beforehand. They reach out privately and say, “I’m thinking about proposing [X] during Friday’s check-in. What concerns do you have?” Or: “Before I bring this to the group, I want to answer your questions first.”
By the time the formal meeting happens, you’ve cleared objections, built trust, and turned potentially adversaries into advocates.
4. Focus on being decisive rather than right
Waffling kills credibility faster than being wrong.
An executive told me recently that she’d let go of three very smart, capable people. “Every time I asked for their input, I got, ‘It depends,’ or, ‘There are many factors,'” she said. “I needed them to tell me what they thought we should do, not hand decisions back to me.”
Leaders would rather get a clear recommendation they can debate than hear you hedge. Give them something to react to, even if it’s not “right.”
5. Avoid making yourself indispensable
When you’re the only one who can execute certain responsibilities, your manager panics at the thought of you leaving or advancing. You’ve accidentally locked yourself into your current role by being too good at it.
Make yourself promotable by making yourself replaceable. Document your processes. Train a second-in-command. Show you can build systems so the team can operate without you.
6. Don’t say ‘no’ too much
You’re absolutely entitled to set boundaries and protect your time. But if all your colleagues hear is, “No, that isn’t possible,” you’ll quickly get labeled as “difficult” or “not a team player.”
Focus on what you can do instead. For instance:
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Don’t say: “I’m not able to meet at that time”
Instead try: “I’m available at 2 p.m. or 4 p.m. What works for you?”
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Don’t say: “I can’t stay late to finish this.”
Instead try: “I can give this another hour today and pick back up in the morning.”
You teach people how to treat you in the workplace and beyond. Start communicating like someone who deserves to be taken seriously and others will follow suit.
Melody Wilding, LMSW is an executive coach, human behavior professor, and author of “Managing Up: How to Get What You Need from the People in Charge.” Get her free training, 5 Steps to Speak Like a Senior Leader, here.
Courtesy/Source: CNBC
